Last night I called Nicole for "coaching." I've never done that before, not even with Dr. K. It was strange and hard to call her and tell her how I was feeling and that I needed help. The advice she gave me seemed stupid and silly, but I decided to actually try it. And while I felt stupid the whole time, I did not cut or drink or take NyQuil. It really sucked, but I don't hate myself for the choices I made.
Today during "Mindfulness Group" we played the Bee Gees, "Staying Alive" with a disco ball and everything. The therapist danced. I twirled a mini disco ball dangling from my finger and watched the light dance. I'm serious. I don't know how that counts as therapy but I felt light and silly for an hour today.