Friday, August 26, 2011

quitting

I've decided to quit therapy, taking meds, and this blog, nobody really reads it anymore anyway. I'm such a loser that I can't keep anyone around in my life....therapists. friends. Blog friends. Other foster kids. I'm just a fucking loser. I'm just done with trying to be lovable to people. I'm tired of trying to keep people around. I get why people leave me but it still hurts. I'm done with pouring my heart into this little box and knowing people are rolling their eyes as they read it. As an email I got last night said, there is no hope for improvement for me. This is the best my life can do. I was never meant to be here in the first place. The only way to stop feeling like shit is to rectify that mistake.

Thank you to the couple readers I do have and I'm sorry I'm such a fucking whiny baby.
I feel like I'm just waiting for life to be over. I'm just waiting for it all to end.  I'm just waiting for peace.  I stopped taking my meds because I might as well be me while I wait.


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